Breaking Free from 'If Only' Thinking: Embrace Your Power to Shape Your Reality

Breaking Free from 'If Only' Thinking: Embrace Your Power to Shape Your Reality

Photo by Luke Stackpoole

Ever caught yourself thinking:

  • If only you started off more successful, you’d have a business, career, or life like someone else.
  • If only that last product launch had been more successful.
  • If only more people recognized your skills.
  • If only you had better leads.
  • If only you didn’t have an inner critic stifling your true potential.
  • If only you could keep your team motivated and aligned with your goals.
  • If only you’d had clarity earlier about your life’s direction.
  • If only you could find clients who truly value and are willing to pay well for your services.

I’ve had countless "if only" thoughts over the years.

Here’s why they’re deceptive:

They make your brain feel like it’s solving problems, giving the illusion of fitting the “missing pieces” to success in place.

But the reality is, this mindset leads only to...

Living in a Land That Doesn’t Exist

This realm is purely imaginary and unhelpful.

I don’t blame you for dwelling there—many of us were taught this by parents or authority figures growing up.

However, eliminating “if only” statements and abandoning this fictitious land grants you a significant edge over others.

Understanding the True Nature of "If Only":

“If only” thinking stems from the belief that the future's value surpasses or should surpass the present’s value.

By embracing “if only” statements, you’re merely an observer of life, letting it unfold for you.

Accepting “if only” disconnects you from the truth:

You Are Actively Creating Your Life as It Unfolds

Here’s my suspicion:

Most people resist the idea that they’re shaping their own lives.

Why? Because it implies they have control.

Control, subconsciously, terrifies many.

They’d be unsure how to handle such control if they acknowledged they had it.

Thus, it’s easier to relinquish control to someone or something else via an “if only” statement.

This mindset might suffice for a mediocre life, placing you among many.

But for those aspiring to exceptional achievements:

Take Control!

It’s not as daunting as it seems.

Eliminating “if only” statements:

  • Unlocks new possibilities.
  • Empowers you.
  • Refocuses your awareness on the present.
  • Enables you to craft your life from the present moment, not an imaginary future.

This shift provides a significant advantage, likely setting you apart from competitors who don’t think this way.


It Transforms You into Someone with Zero Excuses

It also uplifts those you serve, making them better.

There might not be a specific book or course detailing this process, but you don’t need one.

You’re Naturally Equipped to Do This

We all are.

Whatever obstacles arise, you can overcome them.

I’m not even suggesting you should aim to "fail" as that perpetuates the notion that failure is real.

If your initial attempts don’t succeed, others may label it as failure, but...

To Surpass Others, You Must Operate in a Reality Free from Failure

It’s that straightforward.

When an “if only” thought emerges, ask yourself what it would look like if that statement weren’t true.

You’ll be astonished by the insights you gain.

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